One of the beautiful things about life is that we are all different, more so than we could ever really imagine. Naturally, when we consider ‘difference’ we fall into a societal default of comparing our appearance, nationality, culture, achievements and so on- the recipe to appreciating diversity and inclusivity. We soon forget that every single moment in our lives shapes who we are and defines our perception of everything.
When we hear ‘perspective’ we think of our point view, our way of thinking about something based on many personal factors such as: experiences, feelings, time, individuality, backgrounds and environments. Alternatively, the consideration of varying viewpoints comes from the ‘In their shoes’ notion which holds a high dependency to listen long enough to collect all the information you need to even begin to create an alternative perspective. But can it really ever be done?
The uniqueness of a fingerprint or a snowflake reflects that of a person’s life. The more people you meet, the more you realise just how diverse we are. Whether they journey through your life as a blessing, lesson or simply passing by, if we are openminded and understanding we are gifted endless learning opportunities to expand our thinking beyond our naturally-biased thinking processes. Let’s break it down a little…
Experiences
Our experiences are paramount in framing our perspective (what we see), therefore our perceptions too (how we see things). We may have all been in similar situations at some point in life, but we don’t feel or experience these the same way entirely.
Let’s say life is an aeroplane flight (I’m sure you get the theme to the workings of my brain). Take the pilot. Front-row seat you may say. Gliding through the endless cloud formations, a serene view of the rolling hills, mirrored lakes and a patchwork quilt of tricoloured fields. They may have done this a thousand times, pretty chilled, just doing their job, just a door away from the undeniable chaos behind. But what if there was a torrential storm that day, see how quickly the view changes? Or even as simple as location below? Now think of the person who is sitting in the aisle, who can’t see out of a window. All they can see are hundreds of heads, like an extensive game of whack-a-mole, each bobbing to its own rhythm or running down the aisle trying to catch the screaming child. I could go on… but you get my point, we are all on the same flight, yet we all have a different view- life is very much the same. Of course, we will always find similarities between our lenses and experiences but it is so important to appreciate the details and how these will be different for us all.
Feelings
Undoubtedly, throughout life, our perspectives can be emotionally charged. These feelings are connected and are often products of our experiences. How we feel about something and the emotions these feelings carry can alter our views considerably; both positively and negatively. Notably, more positive emotions lend to a more optimistic perspective of the world, whereas, our outlook can reflect pessimism when negative emotions take control. Sometimes emotions are so difficult to explain that no words validate their depth. That’s why it is important to feel all your emotions, but not let them control you. Respond to them and move on. This in itself proves that your perspectives are fluid, malleable.
Go back to the idea of being on the flight. For me, it’s a weird, often imbalanced, disparity between anxiety in the unknown, expecting the unexpected and the lack of control we hold whilst 35,000ft in the air. Take that, sprinkled with clarity in my thoughts, feeling alive in the adventures yet untold and just gazing in pure admiration at the blankets of wonder beneath (in a window seat that is)… and then eventually finding comfort in sleeping for as long as possible. For someone else, it may be a place of pain, a form of escape from a life they once lived entwined with hope and possibilities for the future. For another, it may be a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to achieve their dreams or reunite with someone they love. Take the pilot- depending on what feelings and circumstances were present on the day would have made a whole new perspective alone. The list is endless and even my list would be different to yours, if we were to compare. You only ever see a small part of the picture with the information you have, but respecting these perspectives is the core to personal growth and acceptance.
Time
Let’s take a day. We all know far too well how feelings and emotions can be influenced by time and the experiences within them. On some days it can take just one event, one person, one comment, or even one look for our moods to change. Powerful really. Valuing a specific perspective at this point could very much change in the matter of minutes so it is not and shouldn’t be definitive.
Let’s consider the circle of life… it moves us all (definitely sang that). The perspective of saving. As a child you see money as an entity in need of immediate spending, often for an instant, material gain like buying sweets to briefly pacify the constant need for sugar. As you get older, your viewpoint alters to see that if you save it, it can grow, meaning gaining something of more value, say that be a pair of trainers. You get the idea. As an adult, society promotes an ideal that the more savings you have, the more successful you are at ‘adulting’… but what are we saving for? With purpose becomes power, you have a goal, don’t stop until you achieve it. But for me, over time, my perspective has changed. Yes, save that dollar. Just do it to achieve your goals. Take travel for example, I deem it as an investment in my growth, again, I’ll explain that at a later date. We can always find ways to earn money, it comes and goes, but we can’t buy time to make memories. Life can be unpredictable, live in the moment, make your own happiness.
As humans we are mostly a slave to eternal time. Some don’t realise what they want, racing against the time and having minimal desire to try understanding their purpose and forming an insightful perception of life itself. They find themselves lost. Limited. Others, befriend time to serve them freedom and fulfilment. But the harsh reality is, time stops for no one. Sometimes it takes a really bad day to see that. A day you just expect the world to feel your pain, to stop and listen, even just for a minute… but it doesn’t. It carries on like it never happened. Here’s when you take a step back, you realise that your perspective in this very moment is solely yours.
Backgrounds
Let’s use the fact that travel and food are destined routes to my heart. Take an international breakfast buffet- something as simple as breakfast choices highlights the complexities of perspectives and perceptions. Based on what we see, we ask ourselves, who eats salad, dumplings, noodles or even curry for breakfast? There must be some mistake in our belly time-zones here… well not if that’s the norm in your culture, in Asia, that’s breakfast. No doubt they’ll look at the array of baked beans, bacon, toast and mushrooms on my plate, with a side serving of fruit, yoghurt and honey and think it’s absurd! And I’m not just talking about the quantity! The beauty of it is, when it comes to that international buffet or eating out in another country, we willingly take compromise to our preferences and without judgement, we are all catered for. So let’s appreciate that beauty.
The diversity of our backgrounds naturally prove we all have varying aspirations in life and from each other. Our dreams, goals and expectations are all influenced from the world around us too. More often than not, the paradigm of societal or cultural expectations and assumptions can be hard to escape and unless you venture passed these, you’ll find the expectations of yourself align with these maybe more so than you ever thought possible. Your background is your very foundation to everything you’ve ever known. It brings comfort, normality, a sense of belonging. What’s right to one person is wrong to another. That’s the way of the world. But your background is one of your greatest strengths.
Individuality
Every person has their own point of view. Let’s be honest, some people like letting people know that too! Even if we think we truly know someone, we can never assume we do in their entirety and vice versa. We can’t see into peoples’ minds and feel what they do in their hearts, we only have their words and actions to work with. We are all in different circumstances and all face different challenges in life, resulting in a myriad of outcomes and opinions.
Individuality is everything that makes you, you. From your genetic make-up, ethnic backgrounds, to your values, behaviours… the list is endless. Stating the obvious, we can’t change our own DNA. The imperfect complexity of our cognitive processes means we naturally focus on our own perspective and can find it uncomfortable, challenging or for some of us, near impossible adjusting to multiple perspectives, especially when we consider those who are more egocentric. When we try to analyse the perspective of others, be mindful of how factors like learning ability, exposure, autism, social engagement and the information at hand, in what we expect from others- it won’t be the same as our experiences and how we think, remember that.
I love how different we are, it means there’s always an opportunity to learn and express gratitude. Adopting a growth mindset allows you to alter your perspective, even in the face of challenge or wrongdoing. It starts with how we talk to and about ourselves, as well as posing reflection on our approaches, rather than blame on ourselves. As individuals, we all have varying attitudes, motivations, behaviours and values that shape our perspective. The fact is, our perspective on life does and will always affect the people around us.
Environment
Your environment is always going to be one of your greatest influences in life. That’s not just environment as a place, but what and who fills that space. As we journey through life, we meet many different people, but we will only gain a new perspective if we choose to take the time and invest the energy to understand their perspective. Now, I appreciate I say perspective as its one thing, but just for a second try to denote how many things or topics that could entail… brain over-load engaged. Realistically, it would be exhausting and physically impossible to invest in every single person you meet, never mind all the conversations you could have. Mix that with the combination of already varying viewpoints, my point- impossible.
Nonetheless, this goes for what we absorb in our environment, like social media and television. Imagine just being able to watch one TV channel where you consume information reflective only of one perspective, how could you ever begin to understand someone who dare challenges this? This is dangerous territory, the root to most conflict, but shockingly is the reality of many. Your perspective on life is your survival guide: how you build relationships; how you handle conflict; how you problem-solve; even just your day-to-day function. This works the same for your inner circle. If the people you’re closest to have a fixed mindset or are highly opinionated, without consideration of varying perspectives, just think, is absorbing that information the best thing for you? Is it limiting you or allowing you freedom? Unless you take the first step, you will never know any different. Maybe you may not realise just how important your perspective is until it is deemed to be ‘different’. In a world where we often fear judgement, we may try to avoid sharing views or allowing the views of others to influence us- but again, it is all about how we go about it.
As an avid adventurer, I can wholeheartedly say that my perspectives are ever-evolving as a result of the environments I choose to immerse myself in. We weren’t born to live and breathe within four walls. The world presents the unimaginable, the indescribable. The more places you see, the more people you meet, the natural tendency you have to compare and contrast- finding reasons to be grateful for anything and everything.
Closing thoughts...
Perspective- it is beautiful, truly. Just remember to always walk through the world with kindness. None of us will ever be able to fully appreciate each second lived by another and the depth of their very being- on a planet of over 8 billion people… there’s its impossibility. You’ll only gain knowledge of the perspectives of those you meet and that you take time to understand. Some will enlighten you, others prove a limited view. It may be easier to not try understanding… until you find yourself feeling misunderstood, unheard. How can we expect others to understand us if we don’t try to understand ourselves first? How can we expect people to listen to our viewpoint if we don’t take the time, effort and compassion in understanding others too?
It’s not always easy, this life we all live. It can be overwhelming and sometimes you will never have all the answers. Yes, we will naturally anchor to our own perspective, just allow yourself to empathise and look from the lenses of others too. Thinking on a surface level is easy, comfortable in fact, but surely opening our minds and hearts, maximising our potential, is what’s going to make a difference to humanity and the future of our world?
